ATTENTION GONG SHOPPERS! SHIPPING UPDATE: IF IT IS BETWEEN SATURDAY DECEMBER 20, and MONDAY DECEMBER 22nd BEFORE 4PM CENTRAL TIME, REGULAR GROUND SHIPPING (on most items!) IS FINE FOR LOCATIONS between Pittsburgh and Denver, and Minneapolis and Houston - -- YOU WILL RECEIVE GONG ITEMS BEFORE CHRISTMAS. IF YOU ARE ON THE COASTS OR NEAR THE COASTS AND YOU WANT ITEMS FOR CHRISTMAS, CALL US. YOU NEED TO SHIP EXPRESS. YOU CAN CALL ON WEEKEND AS WELL. WE ARE HERE TO HELP.
When we say these gongs are ON SALE, you can be SURE you're getting them for an incredibly low price.
These are some great gongs on sale for low low cost.
Why? Because all our gongs are already priced as low as we can go without The Malletheads losing money.
We're almost altruistic enough to go into the red trying to get a gong to every human on this roundish planet!
GONGS FOR SALE! Race, creed, politics - we don't care. We want you to have a gong even if you're deaf. Even if you're a quadruple amputee and have to strike it with your head!